Selling with results and without feeling icky (or making others feel icky)

A few years ago an old acquaintance reached out to me on Facebook. She mentioned that she owned her own business now and she thought I might like her new beauty products. She offered me a free sample (and who doesn’t love free samples?). I gladly took it and thanked her for the update and sample. I was excited to try it!

After I received my sample I also received a barrage of messages. 

  • How did I like the sample?
  • Did I want to buy it?
  • Would I like to buy anything else? - insert her link here.

I politely declined and thanked her for the sample again. I said I like to try things for awhile before purchasing. 

Less than two weeks later… another barrage of messages. (All on Facebook, which also — I’m not a FB messenger person, she didn’t know this — but it still irritated me).

  • Was I ready to purchase?
  • Would I be interested in hosting a party? (I would get all these bonuses, and yadda yadda…)

I politely declined again, but was a little more short than my last message.

Then came the big kahuna “no-no” of messages… 

She asked again about a party and frankly was REALLY aggressive about it. 

I finally explained I wasn’t interested at all in hosting a party and asked her politely to stop messaging me unless she just wanted to catch up. 

I never heard from her again.


Have you experienced something like this? I have a feeling you have… 

This ENTIRE interaction was very unnecessary and all tensions could’ve been avoided with a few simple key elements that were sorely missing from this sales pitch. 

Whether you are selling as part of an MLM or you have your own business — beware of this kind of interaction. I want to give you three steps to selling with heart, intention and no icky feelings (for you OR your prospective customer)!



and if you take nothing else from this post, please let this be the thing that hits home

Yes. You want to make money.

Yes. You want to make quotas.

Yes. You want to live a life of freedom and passion.

But also…

Yes. You NEED to take an interest in your people.

If you’re reaching out to someone you know but haven’t spoken to or seen in a long time, don’t lead with your business sales push — lead with… “how the heck are you?!”

Truly listen and care about the person you’re connecting with. 

Don’t treat people like a number, treat them like… people.

There’s a person behind that sale. They have a life, a family, a job, a pet, a home… They have issues and stresses. 

Get to know them. What are they struggling with? What are their stressors? What are their problems? How can you help them?

Listen, Listen, Listen. 

And then listen some more. 

It’s not about you, it’s about them. How can you care about someone today? Make this your new mantra (and you will sell more than you could ever imagine).


Second - Be honest and real. 

Don’t put on pretences of how you think you “should” behave. Be real with people. 

“This worked for me, but this didn’t.” 

“Oh that’s your problem? This may not work for you at all, but in the past I’ve used ____” (fill in other solution that you won’t get anything for because — remember, you CARE about this person).

I have an adorable and hilarious friend who is also part of an MLM and she kills it. 

She shares stories about her life, her kiddos, her struggles, her past and present results using the products she sells (because she does truly use them). She talks about how this business has helped her be a stay at home Mom without going totally crazy and has helped her and her husband build their dream home. 

I LOVE following along with her. Her InstaStories invite me into her life. Her sarcasm is real and so are her toddler's breakdowns… I watch every story she puts out there (even though I don’t have kids) because I love how real and honest she is. I laugh and cry with her. She could sell me a paper sack and I’d buy it. Haha!

This is the power of being real and honest.

You don’t have to share every aspect of your life (you get to choose your boundaries), but if you find yourself tending to be like someone else - cut that ish out now because it won’t sell anything for you. 


Third - Know how they LIKE to communicate.

(If you’re the one reaching out, make an effort to ask HOW they’d like to be communicated with — this gesture goes a LONG way… trust me).

Cold calling comes in all forms now. It’s no longer the physical knock on the door, or dialing up the number. Now it’s about the email, the [insert your social media platform] messenger or the text. 

This one ties back to my first tip — CARE about the person you’re connecting with. 

What you’re creating is a connection, not just a sale. You’re connecting with another human being and your goal is to make it as easy on them as possible to communicate with you. So how do you do that? You ask them… Would you prefer an email with this information or what’s your preferred communication platform? Wanna grab a coffee some time soon? I’d love to catch up, are you a phone person - video chat - FB messenger? 

Be there for THEM and accommodate.

If they’re already a customer with you, the communication platform has more than likely already been established, but if they’re not … pay attention to how they WANT to communicate. This increases your chances of communicating with them exponentially.


Lastly, don’t be pushy, but still ask!

This is just a good rule of thumb. Be open, be sincere, and don’t be pushy. If someone says no, don’t take it personally and stop talking to them. Keep connecting! 

Reframe every “no” you hear as a “not right now” instead, because you NEVER know if someone might come back around, and they more than likely will if you follow these three rules. 

Never be afraid to ask, to share what you have, and to deliver great information! Just be considerate of how you do that. Follow these 3 rules, and you’ll be selling more than you thought possible without any icky feelings. 

You’ve got this. 

Go sell with heart!

“To sell well is to convince someone else
to part with resources—not to deprive that person,
but to leave him better off in the end.” 

― Daniel H. Pink,
To Sell Is Human: The Surprising Truth About Moving Others